Fighting with coworkers in almost every case is a no win situation. Even if you have massive intellect and able to subdue your opponent with your verbal judo and witty retorts, guess what…. you still lose. The relationship is never the same and they will always treat you as an opponent and never an ally. The relationship will never be as strong as it really could be. The potential is there, but that’s all… potential.
So are you saying I have to lose the battle with a coworker to really win?
No not really. Sun Tzu in the art of war says that if you really want to win the war you have to lose a few battles. But nobody really likes to lose, do they? I sure don’t but sometimes, yes it’s necessary.
I say you always fight and your weapon of choice is KINDNESS. In the book of 2nd Kings, Elisha was under attack from a large and powerful army. After prayer the army was struck with sudden blindness. Elisha led them to the town of Jordan where they were at his mercy. Instead of killing them, he attacked them with kindness. He prepared a feast in their honor, and then released them to return to their homeland. They stopped their pursuit and never attacked his country again.
If he would have destroyed them, he would be involved in a never ending battle of retaliation. Instead they saw his character and became an ally. He thawed their frigidness with his kindness.
When someone is continuously taking stabs at you, trying to prove some kind of point going out of your way to be nice to them can be incredibly hard to do. This is a power struggle for things to be done to fit the selfish motives of the ones taking the stabs. Facing someone whose have intentions to harm you and your reputation can be a very trying time for you. I’ve had to experience this many times and I grow each time.
You don’t want your kindness to be mistaken for weakness. You have come too far to lose ground now, I know, but there’s a better way and it’s to fight with kindness.
People aren’t above fighting dirty and when they do don’t be afraid to acknowledge it. You don’t have to pretend it’s not happening and it’s okay. It’s not! There’s power in acknowledging foul play. Many times the simple recognition of the act stops it in its own tracks.
People may never change but you are designed to be better than petty squabbling by doing your part and found guiltless. Be at peace with all people. Show kindness to your enemies. Pray for them. Love them. Doing so is heaping burning coals on their heads. Don’t participate in cruel acts. Be better than that. Shape your character. Change your life. Don’t be overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good.
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